Op-Eds

Read about Love Takes Over: Takeover of America’s local newspapers.

Here are a few of the Op-Eds we’ve already received. No particular order. They come in from Wisconsin, South Carolina, New Jersey, Texas, and California.

More will be posted up in the coming days.

Haven’t written yours yet? Remember: Love Takes Over is going on until January 9th.

Note: Opinions expressed in each article are those of each individual author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Love Takes Over campaign organizers. 

Baraboo, Wisconsin 

Dear Editor

I’m writing to you this week as part of a nationwide movement called Love Takes Over. The purpose is to spread personal stories in the quest for equal rights for gays and lesbians. This is a story about a friend of mine. 

I lived in Baraboo during my high school and early college years, well over thirty years ago. It seems like yesterday. During my years there, I became good friends with a fellow student. At that time, it was unusual to think of boys and girls just being friends. 

My friend became more troubled and dropped out of high school. We drifted apart and when we reconnected, I discovered that he had moved to San Francisco. 

Our friendship picked up exactly where it left off. That was when I learned how difficult those teenage years had been for him living in a small town in the early 70s. As a young gay teen, he lived in fear of discrimination, was very lonely and even contemplated suicide. Only moving to a more accepting community saved him. 

I’m writing to you today to speak to every resident in Baraboo. Today we hear about equal rights for gays and lesbians in the news. We’ve seen Iowa legalize same-sex marriage, and we’ve seen Wisconsin create domestic partnerships.

I want you to know that gay people are just like the rest of us and just as diverse as the rest of us. Over the years, I’ve been blessed with many friends who just happen to be gay. I know so many couples that have been together for years. They want only one thing. Equal rights under the law. There are 1138 Federal rights afforded to married couples. Currently, none of these are available to gays and lesbians since the Federal government does not recognize same sex marriages, even in states where it is legal. 

Parents, teach your children not to bully kids who are different. Gay kids experience teasing almost every day. Love your children if they are gay. People are born with their sexual orientation or their gender identity. I’m a biologist and a lot of evidence supports this. This information is readily available on reliable websites. Both the American Psychological Association and the American Medical Association support ending discrimination against lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgender people. Discrimination is damaging to one’s mental health and quality of life. It is only our ignorance that allows discrimination to continue to exist. 

Please open your hearts and minds. We are all human. Please support laws that end discrimination. Everyone has the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. 

Sincerely
Jude Noble Stevens
Class of 1972 

South Carolina 

We watched as marriage equality was defeated in California and some of us wept while others cheered. We listened as marriage equality was voted down in Maine and some of us wept while others cheered. We got the news that marriage equality was the law of the land in Iowa and some of us cheered while others wept.Such a visceral reaction on both sides.But why?It’s only love. It’s only two people wanting to make a commitment to be together and live together, and be accepted as equal by our state, our country, our friends and family. So, what exactly is wrong with same-sex marriage? I’ve heard all the arguments:

• God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. But if you understand that being gay is not a choice—and it isn’t, because who would choose to live a life where they can be fired, evicted, beaten or murdered just for being themselves—well, then God did make Adam and Steve. For all the differences in each religious belief, it can all be boiled down to one point: God is love. God isn’t hate and discrimination. god is love.
• Marriage has traditionally been one man-one woman for over five thousand years and it’s never changed. Not true. Used to be marriages were performed to unite two families into one more powerful family. Used to be that the woman became the property of the man after marriage and she had no voice in familial maters. Used to be that divorce was not an option. Used to be marriage was to create a family, and keep the family line going. Used to be that it was wrong to marry outside your faith, or your socio-economic class. Now, marriage is based on love; the couple are equal in the marriage; you have the choice to marry the person you love; you have the choice to have a family or not.  
• Marriage is a religious institution. Well, no it isn’t. While marriages are often performed in churches, a marriage isn’t legal until the state says it’s legal, which makes marriage a civil institution and a civil right, guaranteed to all under the Constitution of this country.
• Same-sex marriage will destroy the sanctity of marriage. This is simply not true. You just have to look at Massachusetts to see that. Marriage equality has been on the books for several years now, and so-called rational marriage hasn’t been destroyed. Marriages are destroyed by the people in the marriage who choose to opt out of the commitment they entered. Mark Sanford. John Ensign. Britney Spears. John Edwards. Jennifer Lopez. Newt Gingrich. All straight. All have destroyed, or made a mockery of, marriage.

The LGBT community doesn’t want to step on your marriage because we can’t. We don’t want to destroy your marriage because we can’t. We simply want the same rights and privileges other people enjoy. Years ago, my partner was hospitalized. Luckily, we lived in Miami at the time, so i was allowed to spend the night in the room before and after his surgery; I was allowed to be in the room when the doctor consulted him; I was treated as his family.That’s all we want; to be treated as a family; to be accepted as a family.It’s only love.  Robert Slatten

 

New Jersey

As we begin both a new year and a new decade, it’s not uncommon to reflect upon one’s past — and the people and communities that have shaped our collective experiences. I was raised on Godwin Avenue in Wyckoff, NJ. Our cousins lived in Midland Park. Our house of worship was first in Waldwick, and then relocated to Mahwah. 
I attended Lincoln School and then Eisenhower, where I was one of only three honored graduates. Continuing on to Ramapo in Franklin Lakes, I finished high school in the Top Ten of my class of 400+ students, where I was quite active extracurricularly, particularly as president of the theatre club, Gold Masque.
I held down a part-time job in Ridgewood, and volunteered in a local nursing home with my brother. My college years were spent at Rutgers University, where I graduated valedictorian in the School of Journalism and Communication in 1987. I now enjoy an eclectic career in the arts as a writer and performer in New York City.
Despite my dossier, I’m discriminated against by the state and federal governments because, in addition to my myriad of achievements, I’m gay, and unable to marry. This week, there is a national campaign underway to bring local stories of LGBTQ people to the attention of their communities (http://lovetakesover.tumblr.com). This is my effort to do so with dignity — to demonstrate to northwest Bergen County that your neighbors and/or their children may be homosexual and deserve your support for equality under the law.
Despite my first class accomplishments, I’m a second-class citizen who’s denied the civil right of civil marriage. Please elect local and state politicians who recognize that LGBTQ Americans — like their counterparts in Canada, Norway, Sweden, Holland, Belgium, Spain and South Africa — deserve to marry. 
Happy New Year,
Sidney B. GrantFormer ResidentWyckoff, N.J.

Many argue for gay rights and marriage equality using the abstract concepts of justice and equality. There is, however, a very real argument: each of us will face the judgment of history.

Marriage equality is inevitable. In our history is a clear pattern of granting equal rights to others. African Americans, women, etc, have all been granted legal equalities. The same oppositions used today, scripture, tradition, and fear of the change, have been used to deny equality in the past. But Americans are the theologians who reinterpret scripture according to justice, the pioneers who bravely explore new worlds, and the rebels who throw off tradition in the name of equality and inalienable rights. Though equality can be delayed, it is inevitable, and will lead to the judgment to come. Today King, Sojourner Truth, and the Freedom Riders are honored by us. Those they opposed, the segregationists, the KKK, etc., are now shameful reminders of what we should not become. The opposition today appeals to the past because they need to blind you to this future. But when equality prevails, you will be judged. Will you proudly talk of how you fought for equality, or shamefully try to justify its abandonment?

- Zachary Maichuk


Marriage equality is a human rights issue. Gays and lesbians were tortured and executed throughout history. Being gay was punishable by death in France, England and Germany until the 18th and 19th Century. Hitler executed gay and lesbian members of the Nazi Party. 100,000 gay German citizens were arrested; 15,000 were sent to concentration camps and had a 60% death rate. Hundreds of gays were court ordered to be castrated and many were used for target practice. Even after the war, gays were re-arrested. Tragic murders of gays continue in the present day U.S., and Uganda recently proposed legislation to execute gays.

Human rights are at stake. How will hateful groups allow gays and lesbians to even exist if our government can’t set an example that being LBGT is a natural state of existence found in thousands of animal species? It’s our legislators’ duty to help end the violence by extending real civil liberties by granting devoted same-sex couples a legal marriage. Polls show New Jerseyans overwhelmingly support marriage equality. The New Jersey State Legislature must protect human rights and civil rights. Their constituents support them on this issue - you have our vote! Now pass it!
- Jen Ba

Texas

Looking back, 2009 was an unforgettable year for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender citizens of El Paso. An incident at a landmark El Paso restaurant left some wondering about the legality of being intimate with your partner in public. Then City Council passed a resolution awarding the domestic partners of both LGBT and heterosexual city employees the same benefits as those offered to married employees. Both events threw our humble city into the national spotlight.

And just as those who believe in equality set in motion the equal treatment of LGBT by their city, the opposition with their perverse minds set on men frolicking in a bathhouse after recruiting an impressionable youth, sprung into action. Their revolting invective included tactics straight out of the AFA’s They’re Coming to Your Town DVD that highlights how homosexuals are taking over Christian American towns the way mold takes over bread. They simply instilled fear, guilt and shame to the City Council and those who support equality. But thankfully, it didn’t work.

The opposition is so fixated on the idea that LGBT are godless, anti-church and Christophobic people they simply cannot accept that one can be gay and spiritual. But ask anyone who knows of one gay or lesbian and they’ll tell you that nothing can be further from the truth. After all, are we not all made in the image of God? Or does that only apply to those who dress in fancy suits, have 3.2 children and have two cars in each garage? Now the argument has spilled over to marriage. It’s not enough that the opposition wants LGBT people to stay in the closet forever, but reverse marriage laws that have already taken place. In California, for example, those who were married before Prop 8 are still considered married and those who did not, aren’t. A very obvious class of people exists here. Those whose marriages are equal to heterosexuals and those who did not make the deadline who won’t be treated equally by the state.

So what’s the problem with two men or two women getting married? “If society same sex marriage, then why not marry an animal or your car,” they argue. Well first you’d have to get your car or dog’s consent. Besides, there are things in our culture like guns that are perfectly legal yet kill thousands every year. Conservatives, however, see little wrong with that.

- David Torres

California

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal” reads the Declaration of Independence. And our Constitution’s 14^th Amendment requires states to provide equal protection under the law to all people. But these two documents don’t seem to  apply to gay people. They can’t proudly serve their country in our armed forces, they are discriminated against at their jobs, they are bullied and harassed at school, they can’t even walk down the street without fear of violence. And they can’t enjoy the social, emotional and financial benefits of marriage. Why not? Some say it’s because marriage is a sacred institution that needs to be protected. Interestingly, dozens of couples get married every day by a county clerk at SF City Hall and the ONLY requirement is that they both be single and over 18. The cost is $93. In Las Vegas this year approximately 150,000 couples will get married. Some in drive-thru chapels, some by Elvis impersonators. Some will have just met, some will be hung over, and some still drunk. All that any of them need to marry is a valid ID and $55. But no gay couples will be allowed to marry at City Hall or Las Vegas, because it’s illegal and clearly signals the end of civilization as we know it. And while all these straight folks are getting married, the divorce rate in California stands at about 40%. That would seem to be the real threat to marriage, the true hardship for our kids. Yet divorce is still legal (even though it’s a sin) and you can get a cheap one right now in Las Vegas with no waiting. Unless you’re gay. Heck, you probably know someone who is gay. They are your friends, your neighbors, your family members, your coworkers. It’s time to treat them the way you want to be treated, and equally in the eyes of the law. Let’s repeal Prop 8 in 2010 and allow all loving couples to marry. And divorced too. In Vegas, by Elvis. Let Freedom Ring,Billy BradfordCastro Valley, CA 


I am a straight man very concerned about the civil rights of
same-gender persons to marry. I feel especially strong about this
because of the experience I had with my wife, Fabiola, who almost
twenty years ago died after a twelve-year battle with Alzheimer’s
Disease.

I would have been totally devastated by that experience, but, because
we were married in the eyes of the law we received enormous support
from my employer, coworkers, doctors, nurses, hospital aides,
hospitals, nursing homes, family, insurance companies, and other
organizations.

If we had not been married, we would not have received that support
and my wife would not have gotten the wonderful care she received, and
I would have gone broke and lost both our home and my mind.

Of course, nobody ever said that I could not marry Fabiola because
that was accepted and legal.  However,  the same right we had should
also be there for those in same-sex relationships who want to be
married, because they are human beings—and taxpayers—too, and their
relationships are no less profound than ours.

Legalizing same-sex marriage could in no way change for me the value
of the love I have shared with my wife and children, and I cannot see
how anyone else could be hurt by it. On the other hand, because I know
how damaging the denial of this right has been, the deliberate denial
of it offends my sense of moral dignity.

Al Naso
Bakersfield, CA

My younger sister is a second class citizen.  For this she is called names, has been physicallyattacked, and she has fewer rights than the rest of us.  One night when she was 20, she and I sat and talked and cried about how unfair it is for her to be expected to fundamentally change or completely hide who she is if she wants to be treated as a full citizen in her own country.  But, the fact is, there is nothing wrong with her.  She is as perfect as God made her. She is a Lesbian living in a society that says it is okay to call her names and physically attack her.  Our laws say she is less worthy of respect than other citizens…that seems to make people think it is okay to harm her.  Let’s start with a simple change that will create no new bureaucracies and will generate income for our Local, State and Federal Governments.  Give her marriage equality.  That one little change will give her 1,138 federal benefits and responsibilities from which she is currently barred.  That one little change will go a long way toward helping people to understand that even though my sister is different, she is equally protected under the law and therefore worthy of the respect they would show any other citizen. 

 

Helen Acosta

Bakersfield, CA 

Dear editor, The week of Jan. 3-9 is National Love Takes Over Week. The week was founded to encourage people across the country to write to their local paper to remind  that there are still those among us who do not have equal civil rights.I debated about doing this, hoping someone else would step up and do it. It is difficult living here in this paradise to complain about much. My marriage is safe as my partner and I are one of the 18,000 same-sex couples whose nuptials were kept intact in the wake of Proposition 8. I live in a great community and my kids go to a wonderful school where our marriage is recognized and our family accepted just like any other.But I decided to write because it is not just about me and what I have been blessed with. There are many other families and couples out there who continue to be affected by the stripping away of their civil rights with the passage of Proposition 8 and similar ballot measures in other states.

It is my hope that you will continue to keep them in your conscience and your thoughts as we move on with budget crisis and health care debate. There are families that cannot be together due to immigration laws that do not recognize same-sex couples. There are families that have had to leave California and other states where their marriage is legal to care for aging family members or because of a job and, of course, there are couples who simply didn’t “commit in time” and marry before our rights were stripped away at the ballot box.So, I write. I write to ask you to continue to consider equality for same-sex couples in 2010 and beg that you will separate your personal or religious beliefs from civil equality. I ask you to realize that we can all live in harmony and equality, worshipping from our own viewpoints and allowing our neighbors to do the same while enjoying equal civil rights in housing, employment, military service and, yes, marriage.

From our family to yours, Happy New Year! Here’s to hope for peace and equality in 2010 — for Californians and all Americans.Renee Fannin/Yountville

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